Finding Mom A New Home

After mom proclaimed she would never live with me again because I sent her beloved dog, Beau, to live with my brother, Danny and his lovely wife, Bea…we began the search for her new home. Mom was still VERY angry with me, but not so angry that she didn’t want me to help her get moved out. She decided she couldn’t live with Danny and Bea because they both work full-time and there would be no one home all day to take care of her like I did. My now late brother, Stephen, had offered to have mom come live with him and his family, but mom didn’t want to go there for many different reasons. So, I spoke to the Social Director of the Care Center where mom was receiving her physical therapy, and was put in touch with a person who would take mom and I around to look at various Group Homes.

As we drove all over the valley looking at group homes for mom, she became more and more agitated with me and would tell the owners of the group homes that I was putting her out of our home. I just smiled and kept trying to refocus her on looking at each of the homes and make a decision as to which one she thought she would be happy living in. We spent an entire week looking at group homes but mom just couldn’t make up her mind. Finally, I asked my brother, Danny and his wife Bea, if they would go with us and help mom make a decision.  The last group home on our list was the one mom finally said she thought she would like. However, since it was now late afternoon on a Friday, and there was only one room available in the home,  we were told if we wanted to hold the room over the weekend, we needed to put up $1,000.00 to take it off the “market”.  We put up the money and filled out all the paper work and told the owners mom would move in on Monday. That way she could go directly from the Care Center to her new group home.

Over the weekend, I packed all mom’s things she had at my house. I cleared out the master bedroom we had given her and move Bill and I back into that room. I completely rearranged our home back to “normal” now that mom would no longer be living with us. On Monday morning, I delivered all of mom’s things to the group home and fixed up her room for her. I hung all her cloths in the closet, hung her pictures on the walls, and made her space look as nice as I could. The only thing I needed to bring was mom and her TV.

I went to the Care Center and signed all the paperwork for mom’s discharge and took mom directly to her new group home. I helped her get settled in and stayed with her until she dismissed me by saying “you can go now”.  I kissed her good-bye and told her I would bring her TV by in the morning and I left. All the way home I worried about her as I know mom doesn’t make friends easily and I knew she would have problems with the menu’s. Mom is a VERY picky eater. When dad was alive, he did all the cooking and when he died, I took over making mom her “special” meals. But, I just had to put all that out of my mind because this was mom’s decision to move. I knew I had done nothing wrong, and I just wasn’t going to play into her trying to quilt me into doing things her way in my own home. I felt I had already gone above and beyond the call of duty, and if that wasn’t good enough she was free to live where ever she wanted. I went to bed…but I didn’t sleep well at all.

The next morning I packed up mom’s TV and drove over to her new group home. I was anxious to see how her first night out on her own went. I was hoping she had a good night and was making friends. However, when I got there I found mom sitting out on the back porch crying. When she saw me she really started sobbing and begged me to take her back home with me. She said she hated it there and she just wanted to come back home. I reminded her that she was the one who wanted to move out and that she said she never wanted to live with me again, ever! She cried and cried and my heart broke for her and I went in and told the owner’s I was taking my mother home. They were shocked and wanted to know why and if it was something they or one of the other residents had done. I assured them it wasn’t and told them mom was just homesick and I was taking her home with me. They said we would have to forfeit the $1,000.00  because the room had been off the “market” all weekend and Monday. I told them the money didn’t matter but I just needed to take mom home now. I called Bill to let him know mom was moving back in, packed up all her things, again, and brought her back home.

Next: Musical Beds!

3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. gotham girl
    Mar 28, 2012 @ 20:40:38

    You and Bill are so amazing to have put up with all of this! xoxo


    • beyondcinderella
      Mar 28, 2012 @ 21:09:32

      Lucky for me frissy that Bill is such a great man. I don’t know of any other man that would put up with half the things he has in our lives together…He is my keeper for sure!!!


  2. gotham girl
    Mar 29, 2012 @ 07:34:27

    He’s a keeper for me too! xoxo


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