Accepting Change

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone. Zeale Donald Walsch” A dear friend of mine reminded me of that beautiful quote just today. So, if that is true, why do you think so many people have a hard time accepting change? Is it because they fear the unknown, are they afraid of failure, are they afraid they won’t be accepted if they succeed?

I personally think some people don’t always know when change is needed, or if they do, they may not have the skills needed to accept making a change. Here are some examples:

If you have low self-esteem, and you get into a bad relationship, you may settle for being treated badly because you don’t think you deserve anything better.

If you have a weight problem, you may choose  to ignore the need to get healthy because it would mean you have to give up food you love and look to for comfort.

If you have a drinking problem, you may not be ready or able to see the true effects it is having on your life, or on the lives of the ones you love.

If you have a disability, you may be depressed, weighed down with self-pity, or feelings of rejection that could be crippling your ability to seek the help that could lead to positive change.

If you’ve been deeply hurt, you could be so filled with anger, resentment and/or hate, that you can’t see your way through to finding what you need to accept peaceful change.

For me, accepting change in my life has often times meant I had to give something up, let something go, or be willing to take a chance and try something new. When Shantel lost her sight, I had to learn to let go of my need to control so I could allow her the freedom to learn how to do things the way that worked best for her. I could have done whatever it was faster, neater, and in my opinion more effectively, but I wasn’t the one who was blind trying to learn how to live in a sighted world. When I was so filled with anger towards my father, I had to search my soul to find a way to move past the pain and find forgiveness which also meant I couldn’t be angry anymore. As I grew up never feeling good enough and began to see how it was affecting my self-esteem, I had to learn how to mother and nurture myself and tell myself the things I needed to hear which also meant I couldn’t blame anyone for the woman I became. When I went to New York City for the first time to visit my Frissy, I had never traveled alone before and was terrified. I had to find the courage to trust I could do it which also lead to a more independent me.

All these things took time and started with very small, baby steps. A thought I turned into an action, a criticism I took to heart and searched for a way to change, a need I looked for a positive way to fulfill. I can’t remember who wrote this, but one of my favorite quotes is “Change your thoughts, change your world.” I believe that with all my being and have found it to be so very, very true. We are what we think we are. We become who we think we can become. We get what we think we deserve…

Another thing that has helped me accept change, or the need to change, is a beautiful prayer called “The Serenity Prayer” which says:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

I say that beautiful prayer often. It always helps me ACCEPT CHANGE in my life.

Next: The Care Giver!

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5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Lucie Vezie
    Apr 28, 2012 @ 20:58:49

    Bravo! Change is very difficult but when you get the courage the world does open up to you for new adventures! By the way I too say the Serenity Prayer thank you for letting us know that we are not alone when changes are needed.

    Reply

  2. gotham girl
    Apr 29, 2012 @ 17:25:15

    I have always LOVED change. Even if it’s something as small as taking a different street when I walk home just to make it different. Or something as big as moving across the United States to make a home in Arizona when I had no job. Now my problem comes in when a something is out of my control and I can’t change it! Wonderful post. Love you!

    Reply

  3. Megs
    May 03, 2012 @ 04:04:14

    I love you! Change builds character & makes us so much stronger?

    Reply

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