It is with bitter/sweet emotions that I’m starting the process of helping my daughter, Shantel, transition from living safely at home with her papa, my husband Bill, and I, to finding the perfect apartment where she can live safely, and happily independent from us… I knew this day would come, and it has always been “the plan” from the moment Bill and I adopted Shantel, and especially after she lost her sight to cancer. ” The plan” has always been to help her become happily independent from us. So why is it that I feel so sad…?

Shantel will be twenty-one years old in June, and I know She is ready to be out on her own. I’ve watched her develop into a beautiful, highly independent, young woman, with a good head on her shoulders. She is wicked smart, has a command for managing her money, and she really doesn’t want to deal with the East Valley Dial-a-Ride next year, with all the transfers and additional pick-up waiting times, when she attends Grand Canyon University. I don’t blame her. Sometimes she has a three-hour wait for her transfer from Phoenix to East Valley. If she moves back to Phoenix, she will not have any more transfers or wait times at all, and that will be wonderful…but still, something is tugging at my heart…

It’s not empty nest syndrome because over the years I’ve made sure I kept active in things I love to do, and I look forward to having more time to do those things.. No, this feels more like it’s the fact that no matter how prepared Shantel is to spread her wings and fly…she is, and always will be, vulnerable to those who would want to do her harm…There is nothing I can do to prevent that…but as her mother, it still worries me, and makes me sad…

I think most mother’s feel a little sad when their children leave home, I did every time one of our children moved out of our house. I also think all mothers worry about their children’s safety…But, when our other children left home, deep in my heart, I knew each of them could spot danger. With Shantel, my biggest fear for her safety is that she won’t always know when danger is lurking.. and that does, and always will, break my heart.

All that said, I know each of us are on our own life plan path, and we must follow that path wherever it leads us. So, as her mother, I will allow myself to feel whatever I need to feel as I help Shantel, prepare to leave home. We will begin looking at apartments this Friday, and continue to look until we find the perfect place for Shantel to call home, her home away from home… And, I will continue to pray and ask God to help me be half as strong as Shantel is as we work through this transitional journey of Shantel moving out on her own..

I will keep you posted of our progress in future post so…

Stay Tuned!

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. gotham girl
    Oct 16, 2013 @ 12:22:04

    In all honesty I have many mixed emotions. But, as you said…we all must follow our path. For some reason I don’t have all the words right now to express…but know that you all will be in my thoughts throughout this transition. xoxo Love you MORE.


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