Mom’s Valentine

And other good things…

With all the craziness with my schedule over the past month, I had to tell my mother that I would need to change the day of my weekly visits with her. In fact, I had to tell her that I couldn’t commit to a day of the week when I can visit right now so I asked her if we could just leave it open to a surprise visit when I can work it in between appointments… She agreed, although she forgets from day-to-day what she agreed to and will ask her aid to call me to ask when I am coming to see her again…

So, after a very trying week with many, many, appointments… and still more to come…, I was so excited that my husband, Bill/Bro and I were able to grab a date hike on Sunday… I posted that on my Facebook status. It was fun to just get away with my best friend, who just happens to also be my husband… and be out in the great outdoors alone, where we could walk, talk, laugh, and just remember what it was like when we were foot loose and fancy free to do that at will… Not that I would take one minute away from our family life together with our daughter, Shantel, but still, it is sooooo nice when Bill and I can just get back to basics like we did years ago, and what better way than just a simple hike up a mountain, sit on the top of the mountain and enjoy an apple and a small handful of smoked almonds with a bottle of water… nothing fancy, but when you share it with the love of your life, I would take that over a trip around the world anytime…

Now, back to Mon’s Valentine… I drove Shantel to school yesterday morning, went to my weekly adoration chapel visit, then went to see my mother… When I arrived, she was in the dinning room eating lunch. I sat with her and her tablemate while they ate their lunches, then I pushed mom back to her room where I noticed every tabletop in her room is stacked high with “stuff”… Trust me this is just one picture of just one tabletop that has “stuff’ piled on top of “stuff”…

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I asked mom if I could come back next week and go through all this “stuff” and take home what she doesn’t need to keep in her room everyday, like Christmas bags from last Christmas,  and even Easter decorations from who knows when… I also looked in her closet which can’t even be closed anymore because of all the “stuff”… Mom got upset and  said “absolutely not, I need all this and you are not going to change anything.” I said “ok, mom, I was just trying to help.”

After she decided she didn’t need me to help her clean up her room, I decided to change the subject by giving her the Dove’s heart-shaped chocolate, what used to be one of her favorites… I gave it to her early because I won’t be there on Valentine’s Day.

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She did say thank-you, but added that she didn’t need any more chocolate because my brother, Danny, already gave her a HUGE chocolate bar last week, and my late brother, Stephen’s wife, had given her a box of chocolates not long ago…she said how much chocolate do you think I need…??  I said “Ok mom, I’m sorry I didn’t know… I try to keep reminding myself that it is the Parkinson’s talking and she doesn’t understand how some of the things she says comes across to others… Then I said hey, the weather is perfect outside, how about we go out in the garden and sit for a while? She agreed and off we went.”

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As we sat in the garden, mom tried to tell me about my brother, Danny’s visit on Sunday, but she kept getting that story confused with the story she tried to tell me earlier about the care center getting a new computer system. She told me that Danny helped work on the computer system, of course he didn’t, what she was trying to tell me was Danny helped her with her bingo game….

I noticed a large glass jar of water with cups sitting on a table and asked mom if she wanted some water and she said yes. I put some water in a cup only filling it about half full because mom shakes so bad due to her Parkinson’s. I gave her the water, she took one sip then spilled the rest of the water all down the front of her. That upset her and she said she needed to go back to her room now and get changed. I told her it wasn’t that much water and it would dry in the warm afternoon sun, but she insisted she needed to get changed so off we went in search of an aid to assist her with her need to change her outfit…

By the time mom got settled again, it was time for me to leave so I hugged her and said good-bye reminding her I can’t say what day I would be back but just to know I would come back as soon as I could. She agreed and I left.

As I was walking out of the care center I was feeling a little drained and I said a little quick prayer asking God to help me find something to lift my spirits. When I got in my car, I look up and out the window and saw this beautiful tree in full bloom. Funny how I never even noticed it when I pulled into that parking space, but right when I needed it.., I noticed it in all it’s glory. Makes me wonder how many other beautiful things I’ve missed when I was focused on other things…?

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Then, to add to my lifted spirit, when I got home I received a call from Social Security and was told I was approved to begin receiving my benefits in June. I’m taking my Social Security early to help Shantel through Grand Canyon University next year… But the even better news was that now, because Shantel was disabled before the age of 21, Shantel’s Social Security payments will go up because she will draw from my benefits… So we both won on this deal… Then, when my husband, Bill, starts receiving his Social Security, which will be a few years off yet… but when he does, Shantel will get another raise because she will draw off of Bill’s Social Security.

Counting my blessings…

Stay Tuned!

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7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. gotham girl
    Feb 11, 2014 @ 14:04:23

    Congrats on the social security bonuses! Yeah, every little bit helps! Having spent some time in the Alzheimer’s care center these past four weeks…well let’s just say it really opens your eyes. I always love your stories…you tell it just the way it is in real life. Love you!

    Reply

    • beyondcinderella
      Feb 11, 2014 @ 20:38:09

      Thanks Frissy, yes, every little bit helps. I will get a little less money by taking it early, but I will get it for a longer period of time so it will all work out… xoxo

      Reply

  2. gotham girl
    Feb 11, 2014 @ 14:05:10

    P.S. I think my bro is pretty special too. 🙂

    Reply

  3. katsbynp
    Feb 11, 2014 @ 22:49:33

    It is funny how we see things everyday then one day look and notice how much we miss. Congratulations on the social security benefits! Great post and thanks for sharing.

    Reply

  4. Lucie
    Feb 12, 2014 @ 04:38:34

    Thank you for sharing your day with me. I miss you and Mom it’s been such a long time. I believe that the Lord gives us blessings every day and reminds us of his wonder when we really need it. Blessing to you and the family love you tons sis. ❤

    Reply

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