Christmas Smiles

Now that Bill and I are back in Arizona for the winter months, and are living at San Tan Regional Mountain Park which is an hour away from the care center where my mother lives, I only go to visit my mother once a week. For the last couple of weeks my mother has not been doing well. She has been very paranoid and fearful of everything. It got so bad that she wouldn’t leave her room for fear that someone was going to “kill” her in the hallway’s, dining room, or activity room…. I spoke to her doctor and requested that they either increase her medication that is supposed to reduce her anxiety and fearfulness, or give her something to sedate her and calm her down without putting her in a coma like state. Her doctor said she had “a lot of room” to increase her anxiety medication and ordered it increased and gave instructions to continue to increase it weekly until my mother showed signs of improvement. I don’t understand why they didn’t just increase her medication when mom first started showing signs of the severe anxiety/fearfulness. I don’t know what they would have done if I had not requested they do something to relieve her anxiety and fearfulness. I mean anyone that spends any amount of time with my mother, and actually listened to what she is saying, would know that her talking about people trying to kill her in the hallway, dining room, etc. is not normal, and something should be done to help relieve her fearfulness/anxiety…

Last week when I visited my mother she had not shown any signs of improvement even though her medication had been increased for the past two weeks… It’s very difficult to watch anyone go through so much agony within their own mind when your helpless to do anything to relieve their pain… All I could do was speak to her doctor and watch and pray for my mother to get some peace in her day’s… I don’t know how anyone can watch someone in that state of mind and not do something to help them. God help those who don’t have anyone looking in on them and speaking on their behalf. I’m not knocking the nursing staff at all. I know they do the best they can, but they are overworked, and the doctor only comes once a week.  So if your problem is “all in your head”, and you sit in your room, in your own little personal HELL,  and don’t cause any problems…you just don’t get all the attention you need…

Finally, today, after three weeks of watching her suffer through her paranoid state of mind… when I went to visit my mother she actually smiled at me, and even sang some Christmas songs when I took her to the activity room for the Christmas music entertainment. She even smiled when I took her to lunch, keep in mind she has advanced Parkinson’s which makes it difficult for her to show facial expressions, and she actually ate all her lunch, something she rarely does. I decided that was a Christmas gift from her to me… a “Christmas smile.” I’ll take it!

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Then, when I got back to our motorhome rig at the ranch… I found another “Christmas smile.” We have beautiful tile floors in our motorhome that I just love, love, love… IN THE SUMMERTIME.. but oh baby.. when it’s as cold outside as it has been lately, including today… I don’t love, love, love them near as much… If you think tile floors can be cold in a house… you haven’t begun to know how cold they can be in a motorhome that is on wheels so all that cold, cold, air gets to encircle the entire coach and I mean those tiles get COLD!!!

So, what to do? Everyone knows I’m not about to suffer through being cold in my own home… No, and our motorhome heater warms the motorhome real well but those tiles are always cold… So we went out and bought an electric space heater that heats up those tile floors, and the space you are sitting in, and makes everything comfy and cozy… That’s right, it’s so comfy and cozy that even our princess cat, Carmen, can’t resist getting in on some of it… She just loves taking a nap in front of the nice warm space heater, and that brought another “Christmas smile” to my face… 🙂

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We’re real happy with our space heater but we never leave it on when we are not home. Our neighbor’s, and fellow co-hosts, leave their space heater on low in their fifth-wheel RV for their two little dogs when they are not home, but I’m too afraid that something would happen and burn our whole motorhome down if I did that… But I do so love turning it on when we are home… 🙂

Hoping all of you are finding your own little “Christmas smiles” during this beautiful Christmas season and all the year through… If I’ve learned nothing else as I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned that it is truly the little things in life that make me the happiest of all…

I want to take this opportunity to say a big thank-you to everyone for following my blog as I document our life journey, especially written for our daughter Shantel to treasure as a written family photo album, and for any family and friends that enjoy reading my writing’s…

Merry Christmas!

 

 

 

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10 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. JB
    Dec 23, 2015 @ 04:13:35

    Hey Sis, Your mom looks pretty good! I’ve been thinking of Dave for a few days now. Is he doing well? I sure hope so! When you see him please say Hi for me. If you will or can, could I get his mailing address? That would be nice. Later and love you both, JB

    Reply

    • beyondcinderella
      Dec 23, 2015 @ 13:56:45

      Hi Bro. Thanks for leaving your comments. Hope you and yours are enjoying this beautiful Christmas season. David no longer lives at the care center where my mom lives. He had some disagreements with the staff and moved to a “ranch” care center in another part of the state. I don’t have his address or phone number so I can’t help you out with getting in touch with him. Love and hugs to all and Merry Christmas!

      Reply

  2. Lucie vezie
    Dec 23, 2015 @ 05:49:06

    Merry Christmas to you and Bill. I enjoy reading your blog, thank you for taking the time to write about you’re life.

    Reply

  3. Karen
    Dec 23, 2015 @ 12:56:42

    Merry Christmas Virginia and Bill. I enjoy reading your blogs. Happy your mom made improvement. I have an “illegal” space heater under my desk at work and so I fully understand the love affair! And you are smart to turn it off when you are not there. If we get out to San Tan while here during the holidays, I’ll look for you!

    Reply

    • beyondcinderella
      Dec 23, 2015 @ 13:59:34

      Hi Karen. Love hearing from you. Thanks for leaving your comments. Yes, yes, yes, if you get to San Tan during the holidays please do come and see us. Merry Christmas to you and yours my dear friend. xoxo

      Reply

  4. gotham girl
    Dec 23, 2015 @ 15:55:52

    Since arriving in Arizona I’ve been wondering how you been surviving the cold! Gosh…it’s freezing! So now I know your solution, ha!
    Your mom…I know you know this…but really, they don’t give a shit. At least that’s what I found at the Care Center in VA when my dad was there. They sedate them…ignore them…just hope they’ll go away. So so sad…makes me furious when I think back…but without medical POA I could do nothing. So I totally understand how you feel. On a much happier note…I’m counting the days to see you both…see firsthand how you live your life…and of course take in the beautiful parts of our state! xoxo SOON!

    Reply

    • beyondcinderella
      Dec 23, 2015 @ 23:52:14

      Yep GG, our space heater is the solution to cold tile floors… As for my mother, I know you know all too well the problems that arise when you have family members in Care Centers. Like I said, I’m not knocking the nursing staff, my mother is a retired nurse… but thankfully for us, my brother, Danny, and I both have POA, and he pretty much goes along with whatever I think is right for mom as far as dealing with her doctors and medical care…Oh, YES, GG, we are counting the days to see you and Bob too, it’s our tradition… XoXo

      Reply

  5. Ellen Sweeny Kaufman
    Dec 27, 2015 @ 10:27:13

    I am so sorry to hear about about your Mom ! To look back and think of how she was years ago as I was growing up with her makes me feel so sad to hear health now. All the fun and laughter she gave the family in her youth was a gift to her siblings. Me and my other sister being the youngest love and admire your Mom for being such a strong and fun person. As she also was a wonderful nurse in her day. I know you are doing your best and it hurts you and Danny to see her like that, but you would think they would notices her state of health. Thank God you did and she is back to be as better as she can be at this stage. Our prayers and love are sent to you and Danny for your care and kindness in caring for her and unending prayers for our sister to keep her as comfortable and pray that God will watch over her in these trying times! Bless you all and continue being grateful for caring for our loving sister, Virginia❤️🙏🏻

    Reply

    • beyondcinderella
      Dec 28, 2015 @ 14:46:46

      Yes, Aunt Ellen this is a difficult time for mom. I pray everyday that she will find some peace in her days. She was doing a little better when I saw her last week so I will hope for the same when I see her this week. Love and hugs. XoXo

      Reply

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